from the mouth of the babe...

Pic: "Oh my god, where's my hula hoop? It was just where it haded to be."

Me: "What'd you do with it?"

Pic: "I did nothing."

I could really just sit back and listen to her talk for hours. (And, she'll run around and talk for hours.)

digital declutter (and a little night music)

There is no way I will ever, ever be able to work my way through everything hanging out on my computer. I have hundreds of e-mails, sorted nicely into neat little folders. I have almost three hundred blogs bookmarked. I have probably hundreds of articles to get around to. And, well, e-mails keep coming in, people keep posting to their blogs, people keep updating their facebook profiles, I keep adding to my many, many bookmarks files. Ugh.

Entonces, every so often, I try to declutter a bit. Because everything is contained within the very small space of my computer, it should seem unoverwhelming (yeah, yeah, not a word), but, really, everything is contained within the rather infinite space of the ether and that is incredibly overwhelming to me.

Yes, it's almost three o'clock in the morning, but I was being to feel digitally bogged down, so I'm working my way through some "to listen to" music files (y'know, like a "to do" list). Here's what I have replayed a number of times already this evening/morning:


"Stars - Dead Hearts (with lyrics in description)" [No video, just a still picture of what I'm going to say is the album cover.]

label-maker

I have this life-long love of language. I think about it, obsess about it, very, very often. I give probably entirely too much thought about words and phrases. Even when I seem to be just rambling, I'm concurrently analyzing everything I say, or storing it away for later analysis. And, because I have no real main, unifying topic for this here blog, I figure I might as well allow myself to wax on about terminology when I feel the urge.* So, here goes.

Back here, I said that I'd talk about the term "homeschooling." I keep using the term, but really only because I haven't wanted to reveal just how out on the edge I seem to be.** However, I think it's finally time for me to just write this post.

Yes, I identify us as homeschoolers, but more than that, I align us with unschoolers. We don't use a curriculum and we never have (and I don't intend to). There are times that I have directed what Pic is doing and I'm sure I'll find myself doing that in the future. It's difficult to completely diverge from my own experience, so this whole adventure will be a learning process. I am consciously trying to just go with what works for us and what we are interested in, though. I see no reason to set Pic down with a textbook or a worksheet unless she asks for such. And, please, before you roll your eyes, I actually used to ask for textbooks to read for pleasure. I recently bought myself a middle school math book from a rummage sale. I like to practice math problems. I like workbooks and textbooks. And, yes, I'm a total nerd. However, I don't know that Pic will be the same. I'm waiting to find that out.

I've heard a lot of talk and have read a lot of information on unschooling being child-led, but I am thinking more family-led. Yes, I am working to do my absolute very best in allowing Pic to choose what direction she'd like to go in her learning. I ask her what she is interested in learning about and she requests books on specific topics from the library. She chooses which movies she wants to watch and chooses many of her activities. We don't always do everything she wants, but if we don't follow her desires, we provide her with a reason why we're not going there. For example, Pic wanted to go swimming today, but it was really weirdly cold and windy and Cardo and I didn't want to hang out in the outdoor pool we have access to. We probably could have gone, even if only for a few minutes, and this is definitely an example of us not being too stellar, but we didn't just tell her, "No. Because we said so," and leave it at that. We told her why we didn't want to go and we asked her if she had any other ideas for what to do instead. We played for a good bit out at a park she chose, playing games she chose, after we visited the library where she choose books and a movie. I know this all probably comes across one of two ways. One: You might be thinking, "Duh. This is no revolutionary way to raise a child. Saying yes to things she'd like to do? You should have taken her swimming. What's wrong with you?" (Okay, I really hope you're not that harshly judgmental.) Two: "Why would you give your child so much power? The parents are in charge and kids have to do what the parents say. The end." (I also hope you're not this harshly judgmental.) Pic is a part of our family. Yes, she's younger and has less experiences than we do, but she's still a person. I don't see why we can't do and learn and explore with her. Whenever we want to tell her no about something, I want to have a good reason why. Often, on our walks, she'll ask if she can walk barefoot. Probably a year ago, we'd say no and leave it at that. Now, though, we tell her, "Okay. Please look out for glass [which we occasionally see] and let us know if you want to put your shoes back on." Nothing earth-shattering, but our lives are so much easier.

In fact, since we made the choice to not send Pic off to school, we all seem to be much more relaxed. When we're all together, most often, we have nothing to rush off to. We are able to spend leisurely time together. It's the "quality time" so many are often striving to fit into their days. We so enjoy our time together, hanging out at parks and walking/biking/rollerskating, that this really was one of the many reasons we decided to skip the normal school choice.

So, wow, I've said a lot and I haven't even really said what I wanted yet. ("Oh, no, I've said too much/I haven't said enough.") What did I want to say? We aren't just homeschoolers. We aren't just keeping Pic home from school and replicating the schoolroom at home. As I said, we aren't purchasing or otherwise acquiring a curriculum. So, we fit into the category of unschoolers. I am working on whole-life unschooling, but some of us (ahem) are a little more resistant to that. We'll work on it. But, here's the thing. No matter how much I love the idea of unschooling, I'm not the hugest fan of the term unschooling. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I'm thinking several things. I don't like the negative connotation. I, for the most part, loved school. What I loved was the learning and the (very) few close friends I had. However, Pic can, and does, have all of that without the school building, without the taunting and peer pressure. (We'll see how those negative aspects of life pop up in Pic's life. I'm not looking forward to it.)

I recently saw the term "homelearning." I've probably seen it before, but it just struck me the other day. I really like the focus on learning there. What I'm really liking, though, is "life learning." [If you've been paying incredibly close attention, for whatever reason, you'll notice that I started using the tag "life learning" just before I announced our not-off-to-school plans.] Pic hasn't been formally schooled, yet she has learned plenty. She's been in daycare, but left before the kindergarten program started (she started at eighteen months and left when she was almost four-and-a-half). We had planned on her going to kindergarten, but, well, I started tuning into this whole world of (secular) homeschooling and unschooling. So, yes, we haven't started on the K-12 experience. And, yet, the other day, as we were counting out quarters for the bus, she told me, "We need sixteen. We have twelve, so we need four more." Just like that. She didn't even stop to think about it. I haven't taught her to subtract. I wasn't even helping her count the quarters. All I told her was that we needed sixteen. This was kind of the a-ha moment for me. Although I've heard it many times, that people can and do learn from life, I was seeing it in action. It was a small moment, but potent.

Okay. That was long, but it's late and I'm awake, so I'm rambling. In case you couldn't tell, I think through writing. It is through writing that I often come to understanding. So, Great Interweb, thank you for providing this space for me to spew my thoughts. And, thank you for providing for me oh-so-many resources and community members for this next great adventure.

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* Just an example or two. In this sentence, I had first typed "since" instead of "because." I changed it because I've heard that "since" should only be used to indicate a passage of time. For example: Since I was three, I've been determined to teach. Also, I typed "theme" instead of "topic," but, well, "theme," in literature, implies not only a subject, but a statement or judgment about that subject. For example: subject/topic: love; theme: love is a many-splendored thing. And, yes, oh geez, I could just live in my head.

** Also, the term "homeschooling" is convenient and familiar.

on balance

Like many others I know, I have a problem with achieving a workable balance in my life. Right now, this is a particularly big challenge for me.

We will be working around several different schedules for the next several months. Then, we'll have a bit of a reprieve. Then, another several months of wonkiness. During this time, my main goal for myself is going to be to successfully move from one activity/one identity to the next without completely shutting down.

So, herein, I am asking for a bit of assistance of the cooking variety. Do you have any go-to meals or foods to make and freeze? Do you have any go-to cookbooks for such? We have a great, giant freezer in our garage and it is crying out to be filled with things delicious and nutritious (they don't necessarily have to taste just like chicken, mind you). Please advise.

Grazie mille.

on my islandness

Yes, I know that "islandness" is not a word. Just go with it.

It is very often that I say something and then continue to think about it days, weeks, months (or, even years) afterward. You'd be amazed. Or, just really, really sad.

A couple of posts ago, I wrote something about being an island or on an island, but that's really kind of silly. I have been thinking about this more and more lately. It just so happens that, at the moment, the more conservative members of the group are more vocal, which probably leads to those who are not like-minded being a bit more quiet. They might feel there isn't a place for their voice. In the meantime, I'm feeling that I have to be the somewhat neutral party in the room, but I hope our discussions can be a bit more balanced in the coming months.

So, that's what's been on my mind lately.

'it seems to me some kind of harmony is on the rise'

"Dr Horrible On the Rise"

A little Dr Horrible love. I miss this being available on hulu. Ah, well.

tales out of high school

In twelfth grade, I, along with all the other seniors at my high school, took American Government. I have a few particularly strong memories from that class. It taught me to carry as much as possible in my pockets when I fly (y'know, in case the plane splashes down into the ocean and I need a snack or a magnifying glass). I was reminded yet again that my being good at school is kind of embarrassing and that I'm not comfortable sharing this nerdiness with classmates. And, I learned, that I was one of very few liberals I knew.

We did an activity -- I can't even remember what it was now -- to figure out if we fly left or right. Out of a class of 20+, there were a whopping two of us, myself and one of my very best friends ever, who leaned liberal. (I'm not sure if this friend still identifies herself with us left-wingers or not and I'm okay with not knowing.) I was surprised then, because it was the first time I knew this information about our group. You'd think I'd be over this kind of shock by now, especially considering where I live, but, well, I guess I'm not.

Earlier today, I was reminded just how conservative we trend around these parts. In order to demonstrate the idea of context when writing, I brought up (very briefly, and not at all in-depth), the proposed Islamic cultural center that is causing so much hullabaloo, y'know, the "ground zero mosque" (and, yes, I used air-quotes). Why is it such a big deal?, I asked. Why do we care so much? Because the context for this debate is this post-9/11 US we live in. When I asked where others were learning about this topic, the most-oft quoted source was Fox News. The conversation was as predictable as would be a homeschooling conversation around the blogs I frequent. O, how ensconced we are in our comfy little enclaves. And, O, how alone I felt, on my own little island of bleeding-heart liberalism. Ah, well. We'll broaden one another's minds, yes? Yes, we will. I actually very much appreciate hearing perspectives that are different than my own. I love to learn and I love to hear others' (preferably respectful) thoughts.

Now that all of us in these conversations I'm being wonderfully vague about are out of high school, I hope our conversations will be fruitful and mind-opening. Here's to moving on and growing up.