Monday, October 18, 2010

love and be loved*

"My Princess Boy"

I love that the mom in this story, Cheryl Kilodavis, ends the segment with talk of acceptance. I'm not a fan of the word tolerance, as in, "We should tolerate others [or, Others]." That word -- tolerance -- always makes me think of something we're disdaining, something we don't want in our presence, but something we're putting up with nonetheless.

I'm still not a huge fan of the terms "princess boy" and "tomboy," but I'm glad to see this discussion made public. I doubt it's easy for these parents and this community to work against what seems right (but what is only "right" because we, as a society, think that boys who dress in dresses are inherently broken or wrong). I am constantly reaffirming for Pic that people dress differently to express themselves differently. I'm pretty sure she's heard countless times, from me, that it's okay if a boy wants to wear a dress, too, because maybe he likes the way it looks on him, just the same as Pic loving the way her dresses look on her. I've always thought it was unfair for boys and men that they aren't "allowed" to wear dresses and make-up and high heels because that somehow makes them less male.


* I somehow forgot to title this, so I threw something on there hours after I hit "publish post." Oops.


kate said...

I was just thinking along these lines the other day. For some reason, I was thinking about when we all went to Disneyland and Joe wanted a "pink" glowstick. He kept getting corrected that and being told that he wanted a "red" one. I never understood why he couldn't want the pink one.

v said...

Wow, you have a much better memory than I do.

Very recently, someone told Pic it wasn't right for her to want to paint her nails black, that she should choose pink instead. Don't get me wrong, this child loves pink, but she loves black more. (A little different, I know, but related, I think.)