Monday, December 14, 2009

what if...?

The most recent momversation has me thinking, remembering.

Life Choices: What Would You Be Doing if You Weren't a Mom?

I'm not really one for "What if things in the past had been different? What if I had made different choices?" I don't see much point in thinking that way, other than, possibly, enriching my imagination skills. Things are the way they are because of the decisions that I and others have made.

That said, Cardo and I did have plans in case we never became parents. We were both convinced that there was a strong possibility that we might not be able to conceive (a conviction that was proven completely incorrect about fifteen minutes after we decided to test it).

Had we not been able to have kids, we were going to travel. That's it. We'd still work and possibly things would be a bit different than they are now in that arena, but possibly not. All we wanted was to travel together. We were so nonchalant about it, like, "Hey, if we can't have kids, that's okay. No biggie." Of course, I have no idea how that scenario would really have played out had we had difficulties. But, we have Pic now and we still have plans to travel. Admittedly, our grand plans have been scaled back a bit. For now, we travel to places near, as a family of three, instead of as a family of two. One day, we hope to be able to travel wherever and if Pic wants to come along, we're happy to have her. (The note of far-into-the-future-ness is there because we probably won't be able to afford anything so grand for a couple of decades and Pic will be an adult.)


lotsofglue said...

what if.....
I went thru 9 years of not being a mom, of being totally self centered and LOST.

I have never had my life so focused before Nikki came along. I just existed. I read, I puttered, I stayed up all night.

There was no second guessing the choice of having and raising her, it was second guessing do I stay or do we go??

What if I had never had her??
I would be a workaholic, logging 60 to 70 hours at Cr*ckerB*rrel, if they hadn't fired me for being insubordinate at 5 in the morning. Then I would be at another resturant.